You are the Authority
Contact me: info@firstloveyou.com
Are you an authority?
Hi, I’m Tiffany, Bad Girl Bianca, and Doctor Love. I am the creator of the First Love You website, an individual who is committed to personal development, and an authority on relationships.
As I begin writing content for this website, I wonder to myself about how many people are going to find value in what I have to say? How many people are going to read my words and say “What does she know?” or “Who does she think she is?”
So I decided to answer the question… mostly for myself… to see if I really am qualified to make observations about relationships, specializing in male/female Alpha behavior.
I started having relationships at the ripe ol’ age of 9. Before that point, I had crushes on people, but not until 9 did I get a bona-fide boyfriend. We stayed together for two years and with him, I enjoyed my first 2 kisses. Excellent.
Since the age of 9, I have gone from relationship to relationship.
Some of them for a long period, some for short, some overlapping, some back and forth. I love loving and being loved. I am also curious about the world around me. As a critical thinker, I draw connections, analyze, write, and read.
Those are just some of the things that make me qualified, but of course, not in America, where everyone has to have some sort of credentials in order to talk about ANYTHING. Boo Americana. Yay Internet! :-)
If for some crazy reason I had to have brain surgery, I would prefer to be operated on by the person who has actually performed brain surgery rather than the person who has only read about it in books. If I was going to eat a six-course meal, I would want it to be prepared by a person who cooks, rather than someone who can simply read a recipe.
The most important things we learn in life are not taught in books… they must be experienced if I’m to accept their authority.
We learn how to walk only by doing it.
We learn how to talk only by doing it.
We learn how to write only by doing it.
Typing, thinking, riding a bike, driving a car, balancing a checkbook, everything important… we only begin to understand it after we do it.
I am a relationship-er. I’ve been through pretty much everything you can in a relationship. Long-distance, purely sexual, dating, marriage, open, secret lovers, abusive, healthy… I’ve been through it all. And since I’m an open person, I have no reason not to tell everyone about the mistakes and successes I have experienced. Would you rather hear it from your girl or a shrink? Learn from what I have observed, done wrong, and done right and you will prosper.
The other part of this website, besides the relationship advice and seduction tips, is all about being Alpha.
I came in contact with an Alpha who actually put a name on his behavior.
From that point on I became a student of this type of behavior because I knew how dangerous my attraction was for him... I analyzed my behavior as well as the behavior of people around me and realized why Alphas get the bulk of attention, favors, and desirable partners.
I read and thought, and read and thought some more. Anything I could get my hands on about Alpha behavior and characteristics, I bookmarked, clipped or printed.
I looked at my own behavior in social interaction and realized that when I confidently displayed my Alpha traits, I got what I wanted in relationships! (Even at the same time realizing that getting what you want is not the same as getting what you need.)
I’ve read every self-help book out there, from Why Men Love Bitches to Are You the One for Me. I've put a little money into the pockets of most relationship experts and writers.
I’ve been to therapy… which ended with my therapist telling me that there was nothing wrong with me and that I should write a book about my experiences.
Anything that has to do with relationship and self-analysis is what I spend time doing.
I love people! ...And I love all of the relationship quizzes in magazines and on websites – though I know that they are not real. I also love personality assessments. Tell me more about me! Yay for slightly-narcissistic computer fun! :-) And I enjoy talking to people and learning about their experiences with love and dating.
Sure, these things make me a little nerdy... the fact that I actually spend hours thinking about my role in relationships, reading about relationships, doing puzzles, experimenting with behaviors so that I can master dating, learning about myself and other people... yeah, I know, call the Geek Squad.
But as a writer and a truth-sayer, I thought that the best use of my authority (mixed with nerdiness) would be to offer free online relationship advice and true seduction stories.
I say what others are afraid to say; I do what others are afraid to do. I am not all the way fearless, but I’m not afraid to look dumb or make mistakes. Again, you only learn by doing, and I am on a life-long learning quest.
I take pride in being precise and sometimes find it hard to accept the lessons in my failures. And you know what happens when I refuse to accept the lesson? It comes back again… with a vengeance... until I learn. By writing it all down and seeing it in black and white, I usually avoid making the same mistake twice.
I am an authority on relationships.
It’s my life blood. It fuels me and I’m passionate about it. And since I’ve studied it and experienced it, I am an authority... and you are too... about something. Share it with the world for free and you're bound to help someone. That's what I'm trying to do... help someone.
I think that anyone who looks at their own life… their behaviors, their relationships, their underlying needs and desires, becomes an authority on human behavior. That’s what makes life worth living according to Emerson – self-examination.
I’m not some sort of self-help guru who is coming to you with a plan to turn you from Aunt Esther to Pamela Anderson, or from Porky Pig to Matthew McConaughey. I am simply sharing exactly what behaviors repel and which ones attract.
I’m going to show you that the only behavior that you can control in a relationship is yours... and that you will get the things that you want and need, only after (or by) taking the authority and learning to love yourself first.
Just be open to listen to what I have to say – try it, and if it works for you, keep it. If it doesn’t, at least you know what doesn’t work. I would never want you to take my word for it without experimenting yourself. Life’s more fun when you play in it!
My goal is just to give you another view
...one that works for me and one that I have researched through both direct experience and studying. It’s worth trying a new approach if you’re having trouble getting what you want.
There’s a downside though… I’m a little *tiny bit* intimidating because I am brutally honest. Me and tact don’t get along. I’m working on it though. Ladies, I will try to tone it down a little because I love, respect, and am inspired by so many of you, that I don’t want to hurt your feelings by being too harsh.
Men, don’t expect too much. lol You guys have annoyed the crap out of me for years… especially the ones who would be a good catch, yet refuse to MAN UP …there will probably be a few insults hurled your way. I’m just sayin’.
If you don’t think you can respect my authority, Gentleman, then you probably won’t get much from this. But if you man up, you’ll get something valuable… and if you want, you can send me mean emails about how I hurt your feelings or some other whiny bullsh!t… actually, no, don’t waste your keystrokes.
Just kidding guys, you know I love you. ;-)
I don’t think that I need to have a degree in Relationship-ology to teach you how to be Alpha. I’m only teaching you the lessons I have learned myself (the hard way, most of the time) and what characteristics and behaviors that I (and most women) desire in men.
I am an authority and I know it.
So drop me a line - feel free to send me questions, comments, or suggestions about anything that you would like to see on the website. If it fits with the theme I'll be happy to explore it.
Thanks for reading and happy relating!
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