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Cheating in Relationships:
The 6 Reasons Why
Reasons for Cheating in Relationships
1. If you are cheating on someone, you have an issue in your relationship that needs attention.
Maybe the issue is good old-fashioned resentment. Maybe it's sexual incompatibility, revenge or not healing from a past break-up. Whatever the issue YOU, as a grown-up, have a choice of either ending your relationship or dealing with the problems in your relationship.
By cheating, you are adding to your problems - not escaping them. I don't have the moral authority to say that you shouldn't cheat... I've done it in the past to more than a few ex-SO's, however, now that I'm a grown woman, I keep it 100% real with whomever I deal. Being bogged down in mental conflict was an exhilirating drama when I was younger, but now life is complicated enough that my relationships are safe havens not pits of chaos. As far as relationships go, it just ain't worth it if you can't be yourself. Intimacy rocks!!
2. If you are thinking of cheating on someone, then at least be courteous enough to tell them what you're thinking.
There are many other people in this world that you can be with... why waste their time (and yours)? You're with that partner for a reason... if you're a "team" then isn't it easier to work together to get to the root of your temptation?? Some people resort to cheating in relationships because they are not getting their needs met. If your relationship can't be salvaged, then bid your farewell's and go on to the next one (or fly solo!) with a clear conscience.
3. If your companion is cheating on you and you are aware of it, then why the hell are you staying with him/her?
Is your self-respect not in tact or what? You can definitely do better than being with someone who messes around with your feelings. Without trust and honesty in relating you have nothing.
4. If you are a serial cheater, then look for the common denominator.
Quit blaming other people for your own issues and deal with yourself! Yeah, it's hard as hell to look in the mirror and see your own flaws, but why put other people through your crap if you are not ready for an adult relationship? Most people can find sex without strings... sure you may have to lower your standards to someone who looks a bit godzilla-like or maybe you'll find a hottie who shares your non-committal attitude. Either way, you get yours and don't have to trample someone else's heart in the process.
5. If you are single and you're messing with a committed person, get your own!
Really, I'm not blaming you for wanting something you can't have... nor am I saying that you are responsible for his/her actions (because you are not)... But come on... if they will cheat with you, they'll cheat on you! Cheating in relationships is a habit for some people. Don't hold your breath on that fairy tale.
6. If you find someone who makes your heart sing and both of you are otherwise committed, then it is your right
... no, scratch that... your responsibility (to yourself and your current partner) to end your relationship and see where this one takes you.
Yes, I know, people talk about the grass not being greener on the other side, yet sometimes, it IS. And while humans have become a disposable commodity, you leaving your current relationship for a BETTER match could be the epitome of physical, mental, emotional and spiritual fulfillment.
Your reason for cheating in relationships is usually not about lust... there is something deeper at work. Figure it out. If you or your partner can not work on your differences (as people are always evolving) then let go.
If your partner does not satisfy you, why are you staying? I'm saying satisfaction in terms of communication, level of growth (self-realization), or personal map of reality. It is self-destructive to be with someone who drains you. I do not think that you should leave a relationship for sex with another. That's just lust talking.
But if find someone whom you admire, respect, have fun with, can talk to, be YOU and grow with, then by all means say "peace out" to your current companion. Life is too short for settling out of loyalty.
Your serendipitous meeting may have been the cosmos way of tapping you on the shoulder and saying "you can do better, sweetie." Without sounding too romantic, I believe that sometimes you're just meant to share time with someone.
If you don't have the courage to leave your current relationship then enact the "no contact" policy with the heart-string-puller until you do. And if no contact is out of the question then have gratitude for the opportunity you have to learn about yourself and another.
Cheating in relationships is quite common, and once you know what to look for and how to deal with it you will be better equipped to having a healthy relationship with both yourself and others. Truly, just treat others the way you want to be treated and you will see a change for the better in all of your relationships. :)
Related Articles
* Is This The End? Relationship Quiz
* Threats to a Committed Relationship
* Dating Red Flags
More from Doctor Love
Return from Cheating in Relationships to First Love You HOME
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