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How To Love Yourself
10 Easy Steps
How to Love Yourself
Learning how to love yourself is the key to success in life and love.
I get so many emails in my inbox from people asking me HOW it’s done.
No one ever really tells you how to learn to love yourself, so I thought that I would tackle this topic to help you understand how to do it.
In order to love yourself, you should make a commitment to doing the following things:
1. Take care of your needs last.
I mean, they’ll get taken care of somehow, by someone, right? Not only should you take care of your needs last, you should also keep quiet about your needs. Wouldn’t want to burden anyone else with your 'issues'.
2. Talk to yourself in a critical tone.
Make sure that voice in your head is set on “Mean Ol’ Nag” mode. Become your own biggest enemy! Harshly criticize yourself for minor mistakes in judgment. Point out all of your flaws and magnify them.
3. Hang around negative people.
The best way to show that you love yourself is to hang around people who drain you… whiners, complainers, victims, and the like. Be sure to get sucked into their drama all the time. Doing this shows you know how to love yourself.
4. Eat crappy food and don’t take your butt to the gym.
Yay for processed, unhealthy food! And YAY couch+TV! Who really cares about how their body looks and feels? Cancer? Bring it on! Heart disease? You betcha. A beat-up-old-raggedy-body at age 40 – sign me up!
5. Look for other people’s approval.
Before making any decisions in your life, make sure that you ask everyone else their opinion. Then take it to heart. It’s important to always follow the majority - they’re usually right. Look, a majority of people have enslaved minorities throughout history. You’ll be in good company if you listen to the general consensus.
6. Watch the news.
Clutter your mind with thoughts of violence, crime, and injustice every night before you go to bed. Who needs to sleep peacefully? Fill your evenings with fear in the form of “news” stories devoted to making you hate and be suspicious of your neighbors.
7. Be completely devoted to a man-made religion.
Score two points in the “how to love yourself” department if your belief system starts with You Are Born a Sinner. Live in fear of eternal damnation. Believe that you are powerless and weak if you live an authentic life. Know that you are going to hell for being who you are.
8. Let your emotions guide your life.
Do not let your sense of reason come into the equation. Simply let your emotions run you… listen to all of your doubts. Act on any little thing you “feel”. Fun things to do: Make really loud and public speeches when you are angry or show anxiety and miss opportunities. You will definitely be showing self-respect when you do this, I promise.
9. Stay in limiting relationships and arrangements.
How dare you believe that you should be able to have what you want in life? Stick with your job that doesn’t challenge or excite you… you only spend HALF of your life there. Why should you get to enjoy what you do? And that relationship you’re in… the one that sucks the joy out of you, but you stay because of the kids, the family, or your own guilt… by all means, keep it. Whenever one of you dies, you’ll finally get to have the life you deserve.
10. Treat everyone else better than you treat yourself.
This is the foundation of learning how to love yourself. When you treat everyone else better than you treat yourself, at least THEY will respect you… or will they? Wait. How does it go again?
Obviously, I am just having some fun today. :-) I promise I will come up with an answer to the very real question that you all are asking me. “How do I love myself?” Don’t worry, I’ll show you how. Stay tuned, and in the meantime, read some of the other articles here.
Happy Relating~
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