How to Love Yourself:
Why Alpha?

How to Love Yourself: Why Call it "Alpha"?

I recognize that I have used the term “Alpha” a lot to describe certain desirable qualities. One could argue that I am unfairly judging people whom I don’t know. One could say that I am identifying some people as better than others.

But really, that’s not it at all.

I believe that we’re ALL Alphas. When I say “Alpha” or “Beta”, I mean that Alphas are those who outwardly express their 'God' or 'Goddess' within… Betas are those who shy away from their best selves and their source of power.

I can’t say to someone “Learn how to love yourself”, without giving that kind of love a name and some direction on how to do it.

Being Alpha means loving yourself enough to embrace all of your innate goodness and to reflect it into the world. It’s the sum of all of your powers. It’s letting your love shine through. And all love begins with self-love.

When I first started on my journey back to “me”, I had no idea what the concept “Love Yourself” meant… in fact, I shied away from it because I thought that it had to do with narcissism. Though once I started acknowledging my inner Alpha, all of those unique qualities that make me “me”, I began to understand that love for self really IS the greatest love of all.

Confidence, sex appeal, self-respect, personal magnetism… as humans, we ALL have those traits. We simply don’t use them all the time, much to our detriment.

Have you ever started a new work-out plan and then the next day ached in places you didn’t know existed? Remember what it felt like to use those muscles? The aches and pains were “good” feelings because you knew that you were becoming stronger and more healthy.

This is what happens when you learn how to love yourself. You’re working ‘muscles’ you never knew you had! You realize that you are stronger and more powerful than you thought. You have more control of events because you begin to control the only person you have control over… YOU.

That’s being Alpha.

There was no class in school called “How to Love Yourself”… in fact, it seems that most kids grew up secretly hating themselves, or at least part of themselves… the part that care-givers didn’t approve of.

I’m not saying that you should hide your flaws. Everyone has some hang-ups which require healing our past to conquer.

In the most intimate relationships, those flaws will inevitably come out when dealing with your partner. And in healthy relationships, vulnerability is a by-product of your trust for one another.

Relationships are the mirrors in which you discover and work on your strengths and your weaknesses. They are an important ingredient in learning how to love yourself!

If you are self-mindful, relationships with others allow you to really see yourself, your needs, your wants, and your behaviors.

Some people take on the difficult task of self-mindfulness, but most people don’t. I applaud those people who take responsibility for their lives by becoming more mindful. Talk about a frightening process!

When you become self-mindful, aware of yourself, actions, thoughts, and feelings, you begin to really love yourself more than ever before… but you WILL, without a doubt, be exposed to some very scary parts of yourself. Habits you have a hard time breaking, addictions you would rather not face, self-fulfilling prophecies you create for yourself.

Though even with all of these things lurking around corners, your love for YOU grows in self-mindfulness. You learn how to love yourself by enjoying your personal successes! Plus, it is empowering to learn self-control and become disciplined.

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.

We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world.

We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.

As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

~Marianne Williamson